How good are you an Communication?
Rate yourself out of a score of 1 – 10?
Well today I am going to discuss a subject I deal with on a daily basis, which is about communication and how if effects everyone every day!
Every day our brains have to absorb huge amounts of information from all of our senses, .i.e. visual, hearing, feelings, touch, taste and smell.
What then happens is that for the brain to be able to deal with the huge amounts of information, it will do one of three things or a combination. What then happens is the brain will either Generalise, Distort or Delete the information. So just think about this for a moment, every time you are talking to someone or you are listening to someone else, this process will be going on for you and the other person!
This can lead to problems later, such as frustration and even progress into blame game because what was originally requested did not happen quite as expected. And this is purely because the other person has either generalised, distorted or deleted certain bits of information, meaning there actions do not match the originators request.
On top of this our own skills, when delivering the information can also have an influence and impact on the the person receiving the information. This is because there are 4 Keys:-
The 4 Keys to successful communication are: -
1) Outcome Orientation – Know what it is you want to achieve (set goals).
2) Rapport – Build rapport (how you use your voice (pitch, pace and tone etc).
Words 7% – Of what you say, has an impact when communicating with someone.
Voice 38% – How you say it, has an impact when communicating with someone.
Physiology 55% – What you don’t say, has an impact when communication with someone.
3) Behavioural Flexibility – Be prepared to adjust your behaviour to suit or match the person you are communicating to.
4) Sensory Acuity – Knowing when you have achieved what you set out to do (achieve your goal).
And the final part of the jigsaw when it comes to communication: -
Active Listening – Is vital, because without it, what tends to happen on many occasions people tend to listen and respond on auto pilot, rather than listening to understand before responding! So they respond to the information without actually understanding what is required. Which leads to lost information, leading to reduced results on delivery of any request.
When you look at what is involved when it comes to communication, there is quite a lot to take into account and remember when you are yourself communicating with others.
In summery, know what you want to achieve, build rapport via using your voice remembering to watch and acknowledge the physiology of the person you are talking to, so it is how you say it and matching it to physiology and link this to your behaviour and being able to be adaptable and adjust your behaviour to suit that of the person you are talking to. Then you need to recognise when you have achieve your desired results and you can do this by using active listening skills to check that the person on the receiving end actually comprehends what you have said.
If you understand and acknowledge what is involved when it comes to communication, then you can avoid any misunderstanding or confusion between what has been said, to that of what has been heard. This will also allow you to set more realistic expectations around what has been agreed, between you both. This will also reduce negative feelings and or then going down the blame game route! .i.e. I told them on so many different occasions and they still haven’t done it correctly, etc.etc.
Check out these to youtube links about poor communication: -